Sunday, August 21, 2011

Headline :Wife sues husband over distress of releasing an egg from fallopian tube

Apparently, according to my wife, I am not being sensitive enough to her plight of releasing an egg midway through the month.

First, she said it took a lot of energy to make the egg, and release it, and then I reminded her that the eggs were already ready made ahead of time, and her only responsibility was to  release them in a timely fashion.

All she has to do for her part is just, I don't know, let them come out...

She then reminded me, that my prostate just lays around like a lazy bastard all day, and that takes no toll what so ever on me as a person...

I mean, how could I be so damned insensitive?

I let her go out in the yard, and do yard work after all!

What a bastard!

Now in case, you guys didn't know, my wife has a super powerful imagination, and she can feel that precious egg along the entire journey!

Through all the miles of feminine interstate, to the final destination....

One segment of conversation went like this,

Jill "I think I'll make a roast later for dinner"

Mark "cool, that sounds great thank you!"

Later on Mark says "I am not rushing you, and I don't mean to be a jerk, but I was just wondering when you thought you might possibly make that roast you were talking about, because I am hungry and I just want to know if I should eat something now?"

Jill "oh, when am I going to get up, and slave in the kitchen for 3 hours, to feed you diner?"  "I am releasing and egg after all!"

As a matter of fact, while I was writing this blog, I heard her say the words egg, and fallopian tube like 3 times.

Just kidding hon!  You're a real trooper! I do realize how much more efficient my body is at regulating it's functions, and I know you're cursed with an old antiquated model, which can cause some issues..



Damn! That must really hurt on the way down!!





Men have the upgraded, newer model genitalia that is much more trouble free, but leads to a care free life, and in general....laziness!






 


To everyone else, Jill really is the best wife ever, I am just having fun with her!

Seriously hon, that must suck, and thank you for putting up with that annoying pain every month!  Without you women, we wouldn't have a society, and without you, I would be lost!

I love you, sweet heart! 

Your Cuttle Bunny.. :)
P.S everyone, that roast was awesome!








3 comments:

  1. Women complain about shedding an egg once a month but I jettison semen on a daily basis and not once have I ever complained about it.

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  2. I know Tony! In fact I have learned to kind of...relish the moment! I guess it is because I started practicing this maneuver when I was 13, and have gotten kind of used to it, to the point that it not only doesn't bother me, but has become just a routine part of my life...

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  3. People will sue over anything now..

    ReplyDelete